Friday, March 27, 2009

You'll Feel Smarter After Reading This

I was driving around yesterday with the gas light glowing on my dashboard, hoping to make it to the gas station in time (I did). It got me thinking of some recent moments that have been a little sub-stellar:

- As I backed my car out of the garage, I noticed my husband had already taken the trash cans out. They were really close to the door, so I kept an eye on them. It’d sure be embarrassing to knock one of those babies over. I kept a careful eye on those big ugly plastic trash bins. So careful, I turned and snapped the side view mirror right off the side of my car. It just dangled there on skinny little wire. On the bright side, no garbage was injured in the incident.

- We ran out of toothpaste. I dug around in the linen closet and found one of those little toothpaste samples the dentist gives out. I put it in our medicine cabinet. Later as I got ready for bed, I reached for the toothpaste, squished a dab on my brush and started brushing away. Only, I’d grabbed a tube of Benadryl cream. I can tell you it does not taste minty fresh. But at least my gums weren’t the least bit itchy all night.

- I got tired of having a different remote control for every gadget in the family room. For Christmas we got a universal remote. It has a million buttons the size of rice grains. I refuse to have my reading glasses around just for watching TV, so I tried to memorize what the buttons are for. The other night I was pressing away frantically and nothing was happening. Finally I gave up and asked my eleven year old in frustration, “What’s wrong with this thing?!”

He looked over at me. “Mom, you’re holding it backwards.”


Kim Kasch said...

I think we've all done things like this.

One of the first times I was parking my SUV in a parking building downtown, I was so worried about hitting the ceiling and looking up, I ran into a pillar on the side. $3,000 later. . .I learned my lesson. Maybe.

PJ Hoover said...

Funny! Heavy duty epoxy from home depot will fix that mirror right up!

Rebecca Ramsey said...

As pitiful as it sounds, I depend on my children to work our television. Once I was by myself for a weekend and had no tv the whole time because I messed it up and couldn't get it back on. We have this weird system with dueling remotes ...a feeble excuse.

C.R. Evers said...

LOL! Thnx for the laughs! :0D

Too funny!

unfortunately, those sounds like things I've done or could easily do!

ICQB said...

Oh, lordy, lordy, thanks for the laugh! But I'm laughing *with* you, not at you : )

I have done the remote thing too (stupid reading glasses).

And as for the garbage cans, I've run them down several times - but my mirror is intact!

Early one morning I had to play shuffle the cars so that my daughter could get hers out to go to school. She thought that I had backed all the way into across-the-street's driveway, waiting for her to leave. In fact, I had just backed up and slipped into the empty space behind our other car so that she could back straight out.

Thinking I wasn't there at all, she ended up bacing right into my driver's side door. And what did I do? Did I honk the horn to warn her?


I pounded on my window and shouted, "NO, NO, NO!"

She didn't hear me.

Kelly said...

Yes, I've has those "Oh, man" moments too. Frustrating aren't they? But kinda funny when you look back!! Have a better weekend!

Anne Spollen said...

I feel like I live with blunders like that.

My kids have to format the spreadsheets I use to get paid when I do editing work.

They also are mystics who can unravel the mysteries of our DVD player which has instructions written like : To take the cable in the plug jack not to electrocute.

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

That is hysterical--I love the remote story. I have backed out and left my mirror dangling,too.

Mary Witzl said...

Rebecca and Anne have cheered me up: I depend on my kids to work the remote controls in our house and my husband enables me on the spreadsheet front.

When we were kids, my mother once brushed our teeth with Brillcream once. I'm betting that's every bit as nasty as Benadryl.

adrienne said...

Kim - Ouch! I don't know if SUVs and parking structures were meant to go together. When I drove a momvan I tried to avoid them...

PJ - Thanks for the tip! With my luck, I'll glue myself to the side of the car.

Becky - If it makes you feel better, whenever my daughter lies on top of the remote (which happens rather often) and messes up the TV, she hands it over to her little brother to fix.

Christy - Well, it's nice to have company, anyway :-)

ICQB - Oh, I always forget the car has a horn until it's too late, too. Maybe it should be voice-activated :)

Kelly - True, at least they are good for something!

Anne - There must be a rule that instruction manuals can't be translated by native speakers. At least they are entertaining.

Green Girl - I don't know why, but the fact that it hangs there makes you feel worse than if it snapped off completely.

Mary - Ooh, Brillcream sounds pretty bad! And yeah, I'm always relying on the rest of the family to work stuff for me. Until recently, my son was the only one who knew how to set the flash on our camera.

Debbie said...

There are very few things worse than messing up electronics in front of your kid. Oh, the shame.

Bish Denham said...

Too funny! I've certainly had days like that, but I have never brushed my teeth with Benadryl cream. Oh yuck!

LW said...

I had to laugh at this post because if it wasn’t for my kids I would not have watched TV at all.
Before we got the universal remote I couldn’t turn the darn thing on…and now like you I struggle with
those tiny buttons.

My hubby got the universal remote because my kids went off to college and I wouldn’t have anyone
to come to the rescue.


Brenda said...

I'm glad to know things like this happen to others...grin...although, I can't imagine the taste of Benadryl...yikes...

Rena said...

Great post, but ick at the Benedryl. That had to taste nasty.

Jacqui said...

Oh so familiar!

Lily Cate said...

My mom has done the rear view mirror AND the open gas tank hatch.
But I've got her beat.
Once, I was backing my Dad's little compact car out of the garage, next to my brother's HUGE 70s matador. It had really wide bumpers that stuck out a few inches from the side. I actually caught the front corner of my Dad's bumper on the edge of my brother's big chrome one.
And ripped the whole front off the tiny car.

Luckily, new cars are plastic, and it screwed back on without much trouble.

sruble said...

Ugh, I do stuff like that all the time (although thankfully not the toothpaste one ... yet). DH has a habit of putting the universal remote upside-down and backwards on the couch, so it's always turned around when I try to use it.

My sub-stellar moments lately have been due to forgetfulness, or walls/furniture/cats not being where they are supposed to be (thonk! ouch! meow!)