Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Diamonds Are Forever...Except When They're Not

My best friend left me. No, not the handsome dude in the photo. Diamonds are supposed to be a girl’s best friend, but if you are a flower girl on a mission, they just might leave you.

First, I blogged about my anniversary. Then Rena challenged everyone to post a wedding photo, and then Carrie wrote about diamonds hidden in sticks of deodorant. All that reminded me of how I LOST the DIAMOND right out of my engagement ring.

Recently I was a floral designer for a special event company. Big corporate types threw giant extravaganzas with varying themes. We provided the flowing volcanoes, the ten foot tall elephant sculptures, the authentic Mexican produce carts, all with exotic coordinating florals. Sometimes clients wanted weird things. One day I was commissioned to come up with a container large enough to create a giant floral that would incorporate, among other things, a Styrofoam lemon bigger than a Thanksgiving turkey.

I combed the warehouse for props. I found an oversized megaphone that looked promising - just the right shape for a vase. More digging turned up a large umbrella stand. If I shoved the four foot long megaphone upright onto the umbrella stand - voila! I’d have one extra-large floral urn.

I just needed about five pounds of hot glue to hold it together. I melted dozens of gluesticks to fuse the cone to the base, so the whole display wouldn’t topple onto a chocolate fountain and splatter someone’s spiffy attire. I painted the entire thing a blinding yellow to match the overgrown lemon. The result was dazzling.

I can’t say the same for my ring. I felt something pokey on my left hand and looked down to find four empty prongs where my diamond used to be. There was only one logical explanation; my diamond was now embedded in a hunk of glue in the hollows of a giant megaphone.

I considered melting the whole thing down, possibly ending up with no diamond and no job, either. I figured it was futile to try to find it.

There should be a moral in there somewhere. Loose stones sink in cones? Four prongs don’t make it right? If life gives you lemons, make lemonade - but hold the ice?

So diamonds might be a glue’s best friend. But hey, I still have that handsome dude in the photo.


Kim Kasch said...

That is sooo sad. I lost the diamond from my engagement ring about one year ago, on a train. I felt the prongs catch on something and looked at the ring. So I know how it feels. Horrible. I'd had that ring for about 25 years. The insurance company replaced it but sometimes replacements just don't cut it. Sometimes only the REAL diamond will.

PJ Hoover said...

Your sayings crack me up! Four prongs don't make it right :)

Bish Denham said...

It's no fun losing a diamond...but your story is hilarious!

And hubby looks absolutely ecstatic!

Rebecca Ramsey said... sad. But what a great story!
What a wacky and fun job! Your creativity must just ooze out your pores!

Carrie Harris said...

Yeah, it's really sad, but the way you told it made me laugh my socks off. Well, not my socks but I'm trying to be appropriate.

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

That is such a depressing thing--of all the things to lose...
Glad you still have your sense of humor.

LW said...

I am so sorry you lost your diamonds, but your storytelling is very amusing..
I sympathized with a smile at your
sense of humor and grace.


adrienne said...

Kim - Ouch, you too? Mine wasn't insured, unfortunately. Hopefully someday I'll get a replacement. A bigger, one of course, 'cause I'm worth it ;)

PJ - I don't know why, but some incidents scream for puns.

Bish - He does look kinda pleased, doesn't he?

Becky - The stress level was ridiculous, but it was wacky and fun, too.

Carrie - Laughing, socks off at that comment :-)

Green Girl - It's really better just to laugh at some things...

Louise - That reminds me - I should have included one of the best things about this story - how many of the warehouse guys were on their hands and knees, digging through the dirt to try to help me find it. It made me feel silly to make such a fuss over something that's really just a thing.

Kelly said...

Oh that's terrible! Glad you are still smiling!
I once lost the diamond out of my ring...I knew it was in the laundry room as my ring caught on the edge of the dryer, I exclaimed, "Oh, no! I'll never find it! It's so tiny!" and my hubby remarked, "Thanks a lot!" He DID find it though!

Brenda said...

I'm so sorry you lost your best friend, but you've still got the best prize...your hubs...

Brenda said...

You can tell I'm at work and hurrying through these blogs before someone catches me...I forgot to say what a great guys make such a cute couple...

C.R. Evers said...

OHHHHHH No! I know that horrid feeling! I lost the diamond in my wedding ring once too. On my birthday of all days. (that's pretty much how things in my life go.) It's a sick feeling.

But what a great looking couple and beautiful picture! :0)


Rena said...

Oh no! How sad, but at least you were able to keep your sense of humor about it. Perhaps you can get a replacement because, yes, you are worth it. Great picture too! Awesome dress!

beth said...

If it makes you feel better--I lost my whole engagement ring!! Before I was even married!

ICQB said...

I lost the diamond from my ring while I was kayaking. I didn't notice until I got back to shore and was about to tip the kayak up to let the bit of accumulated water drain out of the drain hole. I noticed something sparkly in the dregs of water - thougth it was a rhinestone that somehow made it into my kayak from my daughter's playthings. Nope. It was my diamond.

Nice wedding picture - you look so calm and dignified and hubby looks like he won the lottery!

adrienne said...

Kelly - That's hilarious! Glad he found it, though!

Brenda - I agree - I like to keep things in perspective. And thanks for sneaking in a visit!

Christy - On your birthday! That sounds a little like my life, too :)

Rena - Thanks! And yeah, I'm still hoping one of these days I'll replace it.

Beth - Oh no! I hope everything else went smoothly after that.

ICQB - Now I can't believe how often those things fall out - and I can't believe you found it. How lucky!
Love your comments about the pic, BTW :)